We all have cringe worthy memories that we hold onto. Some of us more than others. This morning I woke up and thought of a situation I was in my early 20s. A dream during the night sparked the memory and all of the emotions that come with it are with me right now.
20 years ago, I wanted to follow my heart but didn’t understand how strong my mind, desires and ego actually are. I was young and inexperienced but more importantly, I thought I was doing it all alone. I didn’t realize the support system that I had. I was and still am on a journey of self exploration and communication.
Imagine if all of our hidden thoughts, feelings, insecurities about ourselves are actually exposed to the world. The ones that make us cringe. How would that make you feel?
The thing about those cringy moments is that we try so hard to hide them from the world but in reality, we are wearing them on our sleeve. We navigate life, taking turns, changing cars, states, highways to not have those moments attached to our journey. But they are and instead of seeing them as scars that are ugly, what if we looked at our learning lessons as beautiful tattoos that we wear as a badge of honor.
We try our best to hid what makes us uncomfortable about ourselves. We might even be afraid of someone figuring out our achilles heel or weak points.
To be honest, I don’t think anyone really cares because we are all working so hard to hide our own stuff. Our mind and ego needs us to be on top and viewed as cool, successful, happy, healthy, a warrior!
What if we learn to accept the parts of us that we aren’t so proud of. We learn how to communicate instead of yelling at ourselves. We did go through that. We survived. We grew. Let’s learn how to forgive ourselves instead of punishing those mistakes that we made such a long time ago.
Maybe through the forgiveness we get to heal.
We give that part of who we are a nice warm hug and say it’s okay. You are not a bad person. You are loved.What if by forgiveness we create harmony within. We get to use that edgy, ego driven, tough bitch in a way that makes us feel good, proud and secure.
Don’t allow outdated memories and thoughts hold you in place. Maybe we’ve learned a lesson but maybe we’ll make the mistake again. Let yourself respond to the reality of the present. Listen to the internal dialogue but forgive yourself. Use those memories to help you understand your mind and ego. As I say all the time in yoga class, our mind isn’t a bad place. We just have to spend time with our mind and direct it, nurture it, teach it how to focus.
Tell your mind that the only person you need to impress is your own soul.